eWorld.UI - Matt Hawley

Ramblings of Matt

Here's Your Sign...

June 13, 2004 00:03 by matthaw

My dad and I went to the Menards yesterday and were looking for many household items including new shower fixtures and new patio furniture. Well, if anyone knows Menards, you know its emmensly huge, and finding things isn't that easy unless you ask. So, as we asked one of the guys working there where patio furniture, I couldn't resist and just say “Here's your sign...”

Dad: “Where's your patio furniture?”
Guy: “For ourside?”
Dad: “Umm, yeah”
Guy: “Ohh, its over there, (pointing) underneath our 2nd floor area”
Me: “Thanks, here's your sign...”

Ohh, good times. Now, whenever I'm around my dad, all I have to do is say “for outside?” and we both start cracking  up.

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June 13. 2004 08:03

That's almost as bad as my customer who asked me to design a new invoice for her. While in a meeting with the accounting department, they showed us a sample invoice with a tear-off perforated section at the bottom to be returned with payment. She turned to me and asked, "Can our printer do that?? - make those little holes in the paper so they can tear off the form at the bottom???"


June 25. 2004 18:52

I went to Wal-Mart to order a cake for my son's birthday. What was I thinking? Anyway, the fellow that waited on me had... three teeth... Again, at that point I should have just walked away, but... I was desperate for a cake!

So he takes my order, and asks me what time I want to pick it up the next day, and I replied, "8 a.m."

And I swear to you--and I have a friend from California that was with me and he still tells this story--the man looked me right in the eye and asked...

"8 a.m.??? In the morning?"

I handed him his sign over the counter.


June 28. 2004 02:14

I don't know why it is that people don't ever think before they ask something. It's as if they aint got no sense bless their heart. It's scary to live in a world where people ask say stupid stupid things.

For example, how many times have you been lookin fer somethin, and someone asks ya, well where was the last place you saw it? If I knew that, I wouldn't be lookin no more now would I? Here's your sign.

A few years ago I got into a car accident. When the police arrived at the scene, they got to doin their questionin like they always do. We had been hit from behind by a Dodge Ram Truck, and we was driving in a Corolla. Anyways, cop circles the vehicle and I swear to you, he looked at me and said, "so, ya'll got rear ended?". I looked at him, said "Nope, came that way straight outta the dealership" All his partners was wearing signs already. Bout time he got his too.

I would have to say that one of the most easily recognizable games in the world, is Twister. You got bout 4 or 5 people down there on the floor, legs and arms going every which way. At my birthday last year, we started a game of it. It was bout 7 of us down there on the floor, legs and arms going everywhere. My friend walks in, looks at the situation, says, "Ya'll playin Twister?" I looked at him between someone's legs, said, "nope, just doin group Ta Chi exercises on a plastic Zen Carpet" Lost the game cus I had ta get up and give him his sign.

Thanks for letting me share!


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